Mostly Not Work

A blog about life, love, relationships, polyamory, photography and other stuff that mostly isn't about work.

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Judge says lesbian mom’s partner must go

“MCKINNEY — Page Price and Carolyn Compton have been together for almost three years, but a Collin County judge is forcing them apart.

Judge John Roach Jr., a Republican who presides over the 296th District Court, enforced the “morality clause” in Compton’s divorce papers on Tuesday, May 7. Under the clause, someone who has a “dating or intimate relationship” with the person or is not related “by blood or marriage” is not allowed after 9 p.m. when the children are present. Price was given 30 days to move out of the home because the children live with the couple.”

I never knew some states allowed such a thing as a “morality clause” in divorce agreements.

I’m struggling at the moment to do anything more than shake my head in disbelief. I’m just just glad I not have to deal with anything like that here.

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The joy of acceptance

So, last week polynotes Tumblrd:

I want polyamory to become more mainstream, accepted as a positive way to conduct relationships and considered as a possible option by more people. But there is a particular sort of joy that comes from being part of a subculture.

If you’re outside the mainstream in a way that’s seen as negative, sometimes you need that feeling of being special to offset the lack of acceptance by society at large.

But you know, I’d gladly exchange that ‘joy’ of being part of a sub-culture for more acceptance.

I’d willingly swap it for being able to more openly and publicly share my love for the two wonderful women in my life.

I’d cheerily swap some ‘cool’ for being able to go out with them and not have to worry that people see me as some sort of cheating liar, or worse, some sort of misogynistic controlling sleaze who has pressured two women in to accepting such a ‘disrespectful’ thing as having to share a partner.^

I’d happily hand back my subculture certificate if it meant Rainbow & Mrs Menow didn’t have to worry about becoming the subject at gossip at work because of their relationship with me.

So yes, I get it. I get a buzz from being a little different too. But I’d swap it in a second for a more tolerant and accepting society.

^ As if either of them were so weak willed they would accept such crap.

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QI Poly Fact!

rainbowsorbetbeautiful:

Watching QI, just found out that the creator of Wonder Woman was polyamorous. And I looked it up on wikipedia, and apparently Wonder Woman was based on both his wife and his other partner. Not sure if it was a poly V or a triad polyship (I mean, in any case that would be imposing an anachronistic label onto them, since this was back in the early 1900s), but they all lived together, and after he died, his wife and his other partner stayed together.

So that’s really cool. Also really cool is the fact that the show is being really respectful, saying “Oh, isn’t that a lovely story” and treating it as sweet and romantic rather than weird or immoral or greedy.

10 points to QI!

If you’re looking for more on this, ‘Poly in the Media’ has a good write up .

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I’m back at work now, after enjoying a couple of weeks vacation. While I’m still getting myself reacquainted with the early morning starts and reduced amount of free time, I’ve decided to choose something light and fun for my May book.

There are a few different classic works available from this publisher. I settled on ‘A Midsummer Night’s Dream’ because a local theatre company recently performed excerpts from it at Menow Jnr’s school. It was something he really enjoyed, so i figured it is something he might pick up and read down the track.

There is some beautiful artwork in this book, especially in the background of some of the scenes. My chief disappointment was that I didn’t pay more attention at the store and ended up buying the plain/modern English version, when I actually wanted the traditional text.

A fun read, but after two graphic novels in a row, I think I may pick a regular book for my next book to read.

I’m back at work now, after enjoying a couple of weeks vacation. While I’m still getting myself reacquainted with the early morning starts and reduced amount of free time, I’ve decided to choose something light and fun for my May book.

There are a few different classic works available from this publisher. I settled on ‘A Midsummer Night’s Dream’ because a local theatre company recently performed excerpts from it at Menow Jnr’s school. It was something he really enjoyed, so i figured it is something he might pick up and read down the track.

There is some beautiful artwork in this book, especially in the background of some of the scenes. My chief disappointment was that I didn’t pay more attention at the store and ended up buying the plain/modern English version, when I actually wanted the traditional text.

A fun read, but after two graphic novels in a row, I think I may pick a regular book for my next book to read.

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Poly challenge revisited: Day 6 - What does marriage mean to you?

Original post

Sitting here on the subway, staring at this question, I’m not sure if I have a better answer now than the one I gave a couple of years ago. 

What’s marriage about?  Commitment. That was my answer then and  that’s what it still comes back down to I think. Marriage is a sign of commitment. But it’s not the only way people demonstrate their commitment to each other. Buying things together, raising children together, supporting their partner(s) through difficult times and sharing a life together. These are all other valid ways in which people demonstrate their commitment to one another. 

What about multi-partner marriage?  I’m still working my way through this one. In an ideal world - people should be free to marry who they choose. And as a long term goal perhaps that’s something we (as poly folk and a society at large) should be working toward. 

But on a practical level, amending our legal and social definitions of marriage to incorporate multiple partners is going to be a lot more complex than the changes needed to recognize same-sex marriage. For that reason I would argue that recognition of same-sex marriage should be the focus of current lobbying, rather than resources being spread thin by trying to argue too many case at once.~

On a personal level, being able to marry additional partners isn’t a high priority at the moment. That’s not because I’m afraid of commitment, but because, as I explained above, I believe there are other valid ways that I can demonstrate my love and commitment to the people I care about.

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~ The caveat I would add to this is that those campaigning for acceptance and recognition of same-sex marriage should not use arguments or cut deals that sell out poly folks and any future efforts to improve the position of poly people. 

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stupidfuckingquestions:

What do network executives consistently get wrong in comedy? (x)

I don’t think this is something unique to comedy, or women in comedy. If an organisation doesn’t create an environment in which people feel safe to take some risks, then innovation is likely to suffer. On the flip side though, certain environments may create too strong a bias towards risk.

It’s a trade off. A fine balancing act that organizations must engage in.

(via newly-poly-nyc)

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BTW - I’ve still gt some time left before I go back to work so if you have questions, now is the time to use my “ask” box.

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A note to my recent followers

Over the last few weeks, it looks like I’ve picked up a number of new followers. To all of those who have recently started following - please have a big welcoming hug.

“But wait.. you didn’t follow me back? :-(“

Well, yes. That could be true.

I don’t automatically follow-back everyone for a few reasons.

Even following the small number of people that I do now, there are days where my dash is overwhelmed. With more posts than I have time to read, I’ve become a bit more selective about who I follow these days.

I’m more likely to follow people who make a small number of interesting  posts, rather than flood my dash with the same stories I’m going to see everywhere.

Now interesting covers a lot of different topics, and one of the joys of Tumblr is that I wind up reading a fairly diverse range of perspectives and opinions. So even if you’re posting interesting stuff - I may not follow you if I think you’re posting a lot of similar stuff to what’s already in my dash. (hence why I tend not to add many new poly folks).

As for what makes me less likely to follow you? If you post a lot of p0rn pictures/videos on your Tumblr, this could be a reason why I’m not following you. I do read Tumblr in public places (like on the subway), and while its easy to quickly skim past the occasional picture or pass it off as a ‘surprise’, that’s harder to do if you have a dash full of naked people.

Everyone uses Tumblr for different reasons and in different ways. If I don’t follow you back it’s not like you’re “doing it wrong” when it comes to Tumblr, its just that I’m time poor and need to get the most of of my Tumblr time. If you really want me to notice something, message me with a question or use my submit link.

p.s. To all my regular and long time followers. Free hugs for all of you too.

Following